The Twenty Second

DEAR BANK ACCOUNT,

WHY DOES IT SEEM TO TAKE SO LONG TO GET YOU FULL BUT NO TIME AT ALL TO DEPLETE YOU?

LOOKING AT MY STATEMENTS -

Mel P

The Twenty First

Dear Spencer,

I have given my letter to you much thought and it will not turn out to be what I had once considered making it.

A few weeks ago, you posted a link that sparked something of a little debate. You made reference to sure knowledge you have accumulated over the past year. Who am I to argue with one's version of sure knowledge? Tell you what - I'm not even going to try. Instead, I am just going to tell you what I believe as that is all I have to offer.

I believe in the good. I believe in choice. I believe in hope, faith, and love. I believe that in order to believe one mustn't have sure knowledge as it then ceases to be a belief. I believe (even though I can't say with a surety) that there is someone across the world doing something wonderful for someone else. I believe that in the end what matter's most is how we treat our fellow man. I believe it is no one's place to judge nor look down upon others. Likewise, I also believe there is no room to tear anyone down only to try to build ourselves up. I believed I was once broken only to think I wasn't only to realize I was. I believe I am the only person who has the control of myself to let go and love again. I believe one day I might make that jump. I believe that I've been knocked down but I will stand up again.

In the end, Spencer, I believe that believing makes people better. It's what makes life worth living. It's what compels us to move forward, to take chances, to improve. In fact, I believe that believing might be the single most important action anyone takes and the hardest. Anyone can follow sure knowledge. The true challenge comes in following something of meaning and taking a chance you could be wrong.


Still believing and willing to fall,

Mel P

The Twentieth

Dear guys trying to date me,

You are cute.

You are funny.

You are charming.

However, for the life of me, I cannot understand why you seem to treat the dates more like job interviews.

Why do you worry more about the hypothetical situations of the future instead of the present time being spent with me?

Do you realize that every girl you ask these "hypothetical" questions to will always give you the right answer? Though, many will be a contradiction of that. Why don't you just date me and see if I exhibit the qualities you are looking for?

Truth be told, I don't have a lot of free time on my hands. I just want to go out and enjoy life, preferably with someone who knows how to have fun and how to hold a lively conversation without turning it into an interrogation. Please for the sake of myself and anyone else you might try to date, reconsider your game plan. Know that whatever it is you are wanting to know about someone will come out in time, but let the flow come natural!

Needing a good night out!

Mel P

The Nineteenth

Dear Amanda,

I've known you for almost 4 years and yet I feel we just became friends in the last 4 months. I find it amazing that the same source that kept us separated has now become the source that brought us together. Now you are leaving - I'm happy for you. I hope that you find peace and happiness. My heart breaks for you as I know how low in life you have fallen. I know because I have been there. I know the struggle as you desperately cling and scratch at whatever you can to climb out of that hole. I know the struggles to smile, to laugh, to trust. I know your pain in a way that only the two of us can.
I want you to know, though, that you can. You will smile, you will laugh, one day you will look back and realize you are a better person because of that hole you were in. You also need to know how grateful I am for you. You were another loving parent to my children. Yes, our parenting styles differed greatly but at the end of the day my children know you love them and they know you will continue to love them. More so, please know you will always be family - you will always have a place in our home and our hearts.

Jealous that you are moving,

Mel P

The Eighteenth

Dear State of NC, County of Mecklenburg, and City of Charlotte,

As a contributing member of society, also known as a tax payer, who winced as she wrote her check to pay her dues this year, I must confess - I do believe you are wasting my money!

For example, as I drove into the city, I noticed multiple signs indicating the buildings located in uptown. 1st - if those working at the Bank of America building do not know where it is, perhaps, they should find a new place of employment - might I recommend Taco Bell (I hear they can make a mean chicken burrito by the way) 2nd - Signs for the Nascar Hall of Fame - This just happens to be a building that can be seen from the 277 loop easily. If the tourists can't find it, perhaps our local businesses would benefit from the idiots stopping by to purchase maps, snacks, and the such as they ask for directions (mind you, I hear gas station coffee is watered down, maybe they ought to steer clear from that). 3rd - what does the orange block with a white S on it mean? I have lived in this beautiful city for twelve years and have yet to figure it out. How will someone not from here know if I don't? Plus - did we really need to go with orange, I would have opted for a livelier color. Might I suggest cranberry? Or better yet, rasberry, that is the color of my luggage after all.

In short, I am boggled by the changes being made. I hate to see that we are so completely wasting money yet we have to close our libraries, our school system is severely lacking and I can't drive down any road for more than five minutes without swerving to miss a pot hole. How is it these basic needs are over looked for more frivolous matters? I understand there are many schools of thought however I firmly believe that if we fix the core the rest will follow suit - after all who wants to buy a house with a fresh coat of paint but is infested with termites?

Wanting my money to go to better use,

Mel P

The Seventeenth

Dear Sheep,

How many of you must I count before I fall asleep? Who am I kidding - I quickly lose patience with counting and get lost in how fluffy ya'll seem.
#13 - When did you get a mo-hawk? How does our mom feel about it?
#44 - I thought you were looking for a new job - is that process not working for you? Why don't you become one of those Serta matress sheep?
#26 - Are you still dating #62?
#71 - Perhaps you need to slow down, it looks as though you have lost too much eiaght - does roaming my imagination keep you that busy?

Perhaps you guys could be a little more boring and then I could sleep...or maybe not.

Looking forward to seeing ya'll tonight -

Mel P

The Sixteenth

Dear Teri,

I originally wrote this last fall when preparing for your birthday. I never had it printed the way I wanted to and there never seemed to be the right time to give it to you. With that being said, though it has been about 9 months since I wrote it, the sentiment still rings true. I love you and am grateful for all you do for me on an oh so regular basis.


Teri Taught

As I was driving my rounds this morning, I had time to think of my time with Teri. It was about 4 years ago when she first invited the kids and I over for a play date. I remember being so nervous not only because no one had ever individually invited us over but also because I had recently made the decision that my husband and I needed to separate. I was scared, confused, and somewhat lost, and yet here I was driving to a stranger’s home, little did I know that stranger was to become one of my closest allies, confidants and friends.
Four years later I now have time to think of the many lessons Teri has taught me. Of all I have learned, two lessons have shone through. To be honest, and to give Teri her dues, she is humble enough to not even realize the impact she has had on my life nor the lessons she has taught me and has surely taught others.
Going back to four years ago, I hadn’t told anyone nearby that my husband and I were separating, after being essentially a stay at home mom for five years, I was having to go to work full time and was also moving out of our home. I didn’t know what I was going to do, as I had no money and no real friends in the area. At that first play date, Teri asked if I would like to schedule another one, perhaps at my home. At that point I explained my situation, she asked me who was going to watch my kids when I went back to work and I explained they would probably have to stay with my family in GA for a little while until I made sufficient money to provide child care. She told me that was not good enough and that she would watch my children while I worked, and she did. Through out the course of four years, Teri has watched my children, driven all over Mecklenburg county with a gas tank in hand for when I ran out of gas and battery cables in stock for when I left my lights on, listen to me pour my heart and tears out on her kitchen table, loaned me her vacuum, heck she has even loaned me her house. In short Teri taught me a lesson of love and friendship. A friend is not someone who will occasionally call and say Hi, a friend is not someone who just wants to sit around and chat while the kids play, or even one who goes out to the movies and dinner with you, a friend is not just someone who comes up to you on Sunday to see how you are doing. A friend is Teri, someone who lets you know she loves you and is there for you regardless of where you are in life. Never judging, always loving.
I can recall at one point, pondering Teri and how she did everything she does. How does she do it? She is a great wife, mother, sister, friend, primary teacher, PTA president, and so the list goes on. At one point, I thought I would try to be like her by just signing up to do everything I possibly could. Well, I quickly became overwhelmed and soon gave up. Not one to ever really give up I would continue to try to be like Teri. I would watch her and evaluate her life, her family, her home, her demeanor and soon realized that she knew how to prioritize. That was the key to being reliable which is the key to being a good friend. Teri knew that coming to my aid when I was stranded on the side of Fairview, late one winter night was more important than watching a movie after she got the kids in bed. She knows that the pile of dirty dishes is something that can be put off until later when her daughter wants to spend time with her. She is aware that though she may really want to just focus on organizing a craft room, it was far more important to sit at the table with a frustrated friend as she moans and whines about her life. Yes, Teri knows how to prioritize, she knows what is important, once again, a very important lesson.
I must confess my undying love and adoration for Teri. It is obvious that I admire and respect her greatly. She had become more than a friend as I view her like family. Through her powerful example I have learned important lessons that allowed me to piece my life together even though I once believed it to be unrepairable. For this I say thank you. We would all do good to observe because for me, Teri Taught.


One day I hope to be able to do for you as much you have done for me.

Mel P

The Fifteenth

Dear People no longer in my life,

Please stay out of my dreams that only leave me with feelings of....well I don't know what to call it when I wake up, but I don't like it! You aren't in my life because of your choosing, can you please go find someone else's dreams to disturb? Especially you from two nights ago, all thoughts and dreams of you makes me feel lonely and sad. Please, I am pleading - GO AWAY - stop invading my life as I try to make steps in different directions. On to you from last night, you refuse to leave my wake time, can't you leave me be once I close my eyes. Mind you, we did make a pretty awesome crime fighting team last night, but I need some rest. I need to find clarity. How can I do that when every waking moment and now every sleeping moment has been invaded?

In need of some true rest,

Mel P

The Fourteenth

Dear Debbie,

Once upon a time, I started my own once upon a time with a young man. In so doing I became a member of a new family. I was young, unaware, and truth be told frightened. I only knew what I knew and that was what I came from. I tried to be brave, to put on a good front and try to be like that new family. I'm pretty sure I failed with that, and I'm ok with knowing my failure. I must confess though of that new family - of all those new brothers and sisters - you were the one I felt most comfortable with. You were the one that just accepted me with opens arms, never telling me what to do, never judging me for my inadequacies, and always loving me. To this day - almost four years after my once upon a time ended with a not so happily ever after divorce, you still love me. You still care. You have faith in me that I often do not have in myself. I know we will always be family, we will always be connected and for that I am so grateful. I'm sorry it took me so long to come around but I did not know how to handle the divorce and the family. Thanks to you, I now know there is nothing to handle.
I must confess, I was scared that afternoon in March when you came driving up to us. I didn't know how ya'll felt or how you would react to me coming to FL - but once again you amazed me by welcoming me back as though I never left. Just so you know, I don't plan on leaving again. Family is family regardless of how we came to be, we always will be. Right?
As far as Steve, he has his demons to fight. I am sadden but his lack of desire to fight them and how it so affects my children. It breaks my heart and I feel sorry for him when I am not so frustrated with him. It will be ok, I will work through, and I know I am supported by so many, including yourself.

Always your little sis,

Mel P

The Thirteenth

Dear Bob,

You make my world more interesting. From the first day I met you when you came marching at me with a tribal spear in hand, until more recently when you mentioned how I made your hormones vibrate, you have made this trip something to remember. Thank you for the latter, that is an image that will never be extricated from my mind. I, according to you, am an hormone vibrator. Which begs some questions. Do I vibrate all hormones? Is it just the hormones of men?> Or only specific people? How did I become an hormone vibrator? Did I do something specific or is it just the sheer excellence that exudes from me that gets you feeling frisky?

In addition to this, I appreciate your need for me to date. Your need is greater than my desire - do you realize that I am content with not having the constant presence of a man around? Trust, though, as soon as I find one I want to keep around on a long term basis - you will be the first to know - in fact I might bring him in for the three of us to have a lunch date. At this point, I'm not sure I can have a relationship without your approval - HA HA HA - ok just joking on that last bit. I sometimes wonder if this is how the daughter/father thing feels.... well, you know, without the vibrating your hormones comment. It is odd to have a man so consumed with my dating - especially in your position. With that being said, my kids adore you, you provide me a secure future (I hope), and you somehow continue to provide me with ammunition to make people laugh. I'm not sure I could ask for more from you. Well... I can think of a somethings...

Wanting every third Friday off with pay,

Mel P

The Twelfth

Dear Steve,

This letter has been in process for quite sometime. There are of course, the emotions and thoughts that I had long before I decided to write these letters but then there are the actual thoughts put to paper since then. So please, be patient as I try to get all my thoughts out in a somewhat intelligible manner.

I once loved you.
I once tried to become someone I wasn’t just to make you happy.
I once hated myself for the person I became in an attempt to make you happy.
I once realized that no matter what I did, I did not have the power to make you happy.
I once got over it and worked to become the person I wanted to be without anyone else’s influence.

You apparently have played a big role in my life. I wish this letter could be a letter of forgiveness and understanding. It would have been had I written it 2 months ago. Yet, in that uncanny way you seem to be famous for, you yet again threw a wrench into my plans and my life. I finally felt secure in knowing that the kids and I were “good”. I thought that you no longer had an affect on us. I remember feeling relief that whatever was going on in your world, it didn’t matter because I knew that our bills would be paid, I knew that we would have food, I knew there would be shelter from the storm. I knew this because I made it so! HA HA HA, double freaking HA. Silly me, how could I even pretend that you did not have the ability to send me to a dark pit that I have had to work so very hard to climb out of? How is it you felt it was ok to hide, lie, and manipulate me? Better yet, have you not learned? You will NEVER win, you will only lose more and more of what you think actually means something. Is there anything else left for you to lose? At some point, will you finally ever stand up and take accountability for all you have done? Will you ever realize that you like every single one of us on this planet are in the shoes we are because of choices we make? How do you come about in life with having an ounce of responsibility? How can you stand not taking control and changing your life so that you can be something of meaning to yourself, your kids, your society? Do you not want, wish, hope for better?

I’ve jumped a little off course – I apologize. I’m struggling to laugh on a regular basis. I am constantly worried now. You make decisions without realizing how they affect my wonderful children, which in turns causes me so much pain. I have come to realize that no decision you make will be good for them. It hurts me. I did what I had to do to ensure they are safe and protected. I would ask for forgiveness, however I don’t need it. You made your choices, and for that there are consequences. For those choices, I will now hold you accountable. It does pain me for my children’s sake but I had to decide upon the road that would cause the least amount of injury to them.

Alright – so forget a little off course – there doesn’t seem to be a course for this letter. I may struggle to laugh now but I am still standing, I am still smiling and in the end, I am still the one tucking my children into bed at night receiving their sweet kisses. I hope you miss it – I hope you feel the pain from the decisions you have made. I don’t think you will but I still hope.

Working through the pain,

Your Ex Wife

The Eleventh

Dear Reina,

For a while I have wanted to try what you had to offer, longer than my knowing of your existence and that you offered what I wanted. So last night, I walked through your doors to experience a whole new level of activity which brought pure exhaustion and a lot of sweat. I swear, I glistened. Is glistening sexy? You didn’t glisten. Apparently, you know your stuff and have been doing this a lot longer than just starting up yesterday. When will it become easier? At what point will I learn all the moves necessary to not stumble upon my own feet? I’ll have to thank you though, it was fun and I anxiously await coming back next week to see if I have am any better.

Ready to Zumba,
Mel P

The Tenth

Dear Jose,

Tuesday you approached me at the gym by speaking spanish.  Do I really look latin or hispanic or what not?  I've never been confused for anything other than a standard mutt before you came along.  Then, today you ask me for my number, well, after spending five minutes trying to figure out my schedule and when exactly I would be at the gym.  I tried telling you politely that no you were not going to get my number however you came back up to me asking me when you could see me again.  Am I missing something?  You will see me when I have the misfortune of not timing my visits to the gym properly and I have to run into you again.  A subtle hint should have been enough instead I spent my run going over different dialogues of how I was going to tell you to back down or be beat down.  I don't want to be mean.  It isn't really in my nature.    Yet, here I stand feeling like you will continue to harass me until I am mean.  Hopefully, you will get it figured out soon.

Uggh, just leave me alone,

Mel P

The Nineth

Dear Readers (or the lack thereof),

Is anyone actually reading this?  Are ya'll really out there?  I am beginning to doubt your existence and yet I still continue to write.  I know, I know, I took some time off - however let me give reason without making an excuse for I do not believe in excuses.  I started this blog and about 3 days laters, a bomb was released on my life.  I pushed through and figured it would get better however it has been so very emotionally straining on me.  It shouldn't be, I know, I should be able to just cut my losses and walk away(Beth that is for you because I know what you are thinking).  The thing is no matter what happens my kids lose which means I lose.  How can I accept that?  How can I allow that to happen without some thought or care?  At this point, there is not a lot that I can control for people make choices that affect our lives everyday.  The only control I do have is how I will react and respond to what is being heaved my way. I choose to care and to plan - what are we as a people when we cease to care?  The answer is frightening.  Once again, I care and I plan.  It is all I can do as the story unfolds. 
In the mean time, I have letters written in my journal that I will publish soon.  Believe it or not, sitting at a computer is not my favorite past time and my computer is unbelievably slow.  It will happen - just be patient as I work through the mess or drama I often call my life - which who knows - some good letters might come from it.

With a heavy heart,

Mel P

The Eighth

Dear Mark H - Howdy Hoo Kangaroo,

Hey there!  How are you?   How is the wife and son?  Being a father everything you expected it to be?

I must confess, my first desire for this blog started with you.  I was looking back through old emails and read some of our earlier correspondences.  Reading them, I began to feel a sense of home sickness.  I wanted to write you and just act like old times.  I can't tell why I did not.  Perhaps, somewhere our friendship became somewhat stale.  It seemed after a while our conversations became the same.  I'm not sure how to make it not what it has become but I loved our rants back and forth, I loved the yearning for deeper thought, our discussions of the gospel, scriptures, love, bettering ourselves and the such.  I loved the songs - I will never be able to sing "If all the rain drops" again without thoughts of you.

Is it odd that I still consider you a good friend even though we have never met?  Truly, our friendship indicates the best pen pal'ing around a girl could ask for.  I love the random calls I get from you.  I'm so happy to see the progress in your life - everyone has their own road to drive down and you seemed to have done a pretty good job of staying your course.  Keep on it - I'll look forward to what awaits you!

As for me, send a little something for my mind to nibble on.

Missing you,

Mel P

The Seventh

Dear S D,

What happened?  Over two years ago, our relationship started out so fun, exciting and loving.  I felt you were the one for me.  How could there be a better match, right?  Apparently I was wrong.  Over time, the love faded, and bitterness replaced whatever fond feelings once were felt.  At some point, did you realize the shift?  Did you even care?  Or were you only looking after yourself and felt all others were merely pebbles upon your path to success?

I would love to end our relationship, to move on and start fresh, yet with all of your bad you bring so many perks including a sense of security.  I love you and hate you and wish I could find a new path to follow.  I am tied to you.  I want out so bad I can taste it, yet I am constantly reminded that I need you.  I pack my stuff up often, and realize I have nowhere to go.  I hope for a path to open up in front of me, however refuse to do the work to find that path.  Perhaps, I need to realize that all relationships have the good and the bad, as well as the ugly.  Perhaps, the problem is me.  Maybe you haven't changed afterall and I have just shifted my focus from the good to the ugly.  Will I find you more attractive if I just start looking at all the good?  Somehow, I believe I will still wake with a sense of dread because of you.  What should I do?

In need of something,

Mel P

The Sixth

Dear Unknown Force that creates mischief and delights in destroying my every plan and sense of security,


YOU
   STINK
        MAJOR
             BOOTIE!

Enough Said,
Mel P

The Fifth

Dear Sarah,

Every morning I wake and fall in love with my hair all over.  I can't begin to tell you how grateful I am for you going back to school for beauty.  Is that the politically correct way of saying it?  I don't know what it is called, but you rock my hair bootie.  Not to be confused with bootie hair though, that would be a little nasty.  Seriously - though - I wish you all the success in the world and know that you will excel at it.  I have yet to walk away questioning your prowess with scissors, hair dryer and color.  Even moreso, you have become a nice friend, whether it is doing a girl's night  (we need to do something soon) or chatting as you work on my hair, I have appreciated the fun energy you share with those who come around.

I admire you courage and confidence.  I would love to follow in your footsteps by going back to school to pursue something I love.  It's scary though and I question whether or not I really can do it.  You have been quite the example though and it gives me hope.

Not so secretly looking forward to my next hair appointment,

Mel P

The Fourth

May 10, 2010

Dear Paula Deen,

I have never watched your show nor read any of your cook books so I am not even sure if it is appropriate to write you a letter.  With that being said, I do know you are a GA girl who loves butter so the base of who we are just happens to be the same.  My confession: late last night after my kids were in bed and my friends had left - I partook of your ooey, gooey, chocolate butter cake goodness that surely came from the cooking gods of the South.  In case you didn't realize it, I enjoyed it - mare than enjoy - I delighted in every morsel that graced my mouth and set my taste buds a flurry.  I only ate 1/3 of the piece I bought, but I cherished it.  I even let my children eat some this morning just so the could also know what the devine tastes like.

Paula, today has been wretched and I can't help but watch the clock, counting down til when I can snuggle up with a book and finish the rest.  I will seek solace and comfort as I succomb to the confection your genius has designed.  For this oh so sweet relief, I thank you.

Today you are my friend,

Mel P

The Third

Dear Mom,

I forgive you.  For the choices that were made and were wrong.  For all the hurt and pain.  For the insecurities.  I forgive you.

I love you.  For standing up when others would fall down.  For getting back up when others would remain down.  For doing the best you could. I love you.

I have learned who I want to be and who I don't not to be based in part from your example. I want to be resilient, I want to be self-sufficient, I want to have the good heart.  I don't want to be hard, I don't ever want my children to feel like a man came first, I don't want to change for anyone but myself.  I have learned.

Mom, all I can say is we are going to make it.  Life has dealt us quite a hand but somehow you have helped to give me the tools and love I need to overcome it.

See you soon!
Mel P

The Second (should have been posted yesterday)

May 8th, 2010

Dear Mothers who came before me and mothers coming after me,

First, mothers who have come before me - how on Earth did you do it?  Such an awesome responsibility was placed in your hands and yet the world is still turning.  Your children were raised and are now raising their own.  Did you ever get down, forget to smile and just want to cry?  Did you know what you were doing or did you just wing it?  Moreso, when you look back, are you happy?  Do you feel like you did a just performance with the part you played in the lives of your chidlren?
Thank you, thank you for continually striving to help provide us with something to look up to, a guide post of sorts.  Helping those like me find a way in such a scarey terrain.  Thank you for the smiles, the gracious words, and moreso for the knowledge and understanding of what I face when I look up from my child screaming in Wal-Mart to see that all knowing twinkle in your eye (the lady who sliced my meat at the deli counter this weekend - that was for you!) - I take comfort.  You forged roads that I now walk upon and the relief I feel due to that is overwhelming - once again - I express my deep gratitude.

Now - to those coming after me -

Brace yourself - are you ready for this?  MOTHERHOOD IS HARD WORK!  Big surprise, right?  Seriously, though, you wake up worrying about everything.  What should you feed your children?  How should you dress your children?  What school should they go to?  Are they smart as the other kids in their age group?  Will that song with slightly suggestive lyrics playing on the speakers at Applebees ruin your child's moral character for life?  Will the crayon he just ate make him sick?  Should you call the Dr?  Should her skirt be that short?  Like I said, you will worry.
With that being said - everything will work out, somehow your child will survive.  Better yet, they will flourish.  So relax and enjoy, every season brings  a new adventure.  Don't worry as much and laugh more.  Be silly and play with your kids. Know that no matter what you do your kids will always love you but ensure they know that no matter what they do you will always love them.  Raise them to know that your expectations of them are only for them to learn, grow, and find what path fits them.  Stop dream of your future Doctor, Lawyer or Scientist, and start realizing that regardless of the path they choose - the will be fine as long as they find happiness. 
Don't be hard on yourself.  If they eat cheese and pop tarts for lunch here and there, it will be ok.  If they fall from a tree and break an arm - it will heal.  If they stay up past their bed time to snuggle and read a book, they will still wake up and go to school the next morning.  In fact I have found those are the moments that both, I and my children, treasure the most.

To all the moms - thank you,
you inspire and uplift me,

Mel P

The First

May 7, 2010

Dear Me,

Its been a long road so far.  Sometimes you have goofed up, made mistakes, and fallen down.  Amazingly enough, you get back up.  You keep jumping in with your arms flailing wildly, boldly laughing, all the while screaming.  Does the screaming really help?  Somewhere in this process you need to learn to love yourself.  You are worth it.  You also need to have more faith in yourself.  We all make mistakes, so stop being so rough on yourself - realize your worth and move forward knowing that somewhere down the road you'll look back and say - wow, look how far I've made it!  Actually - look back now - look how far you have made it!  Stop being afraid, life is about the journey so even if you don't reach every goal, you'll reach more by trying than by hiding from you really want.  Plus, think of all you will learn, experience, and enjoy from attempting different feats.  Furthermore, imagine the stories!
I apologize for mistreating you.  I apologize for not believing in you.  I apologize for letting others walk over you, for not understanding your beauty earlier in life - I apologize, plain and simple.  Please forgive me.
Remember  - mind your manners, always be gracious, and try to keep smiling.  Somehow - you'll figure this thing called life out.  In the meantime have fun and laugh!

With all my heart,

Mel P